Hiya, Sixers! I’ve got the next six from Girl Under Glass for Six Sentence Sunday. (I’ve actually repeated the last sentence from last week’s post because it sets up the next coupla sixes nicely.) So we return to Rachel, her dogs, and her shotgun facing down an Ohnenrai soldier who appeared in her yard.
========
“I’m not here to hurt you. I need a comtab,” the soldier said in English. His fatigues were torn and muddy. A large gash, encrusted with blue blood, stretched from his temple to his cheek and cut across his nose. His left eye was swollen, and blood caked the edges of his nostrils. His hands were bloodied and bruised.
========
As always, I encourage you to check out the other snippets available for Six Sentence Sunday via the official site.
Thanks for visiting!
========
Pingback: Six Sentence Sunday: Girl Under Glass #6 — You’re in Suffer | Stalking Fiction: Monica Enderle Pierce
Really great imagery, here! And now I, too, know what a comtab is. :c)
Blue blood – great image. Nice six!
I don’t know what a comtab is but based on the description of his injuries I’d say he needs one.
LOL! I’m guessing you don’t read much sci-fi, Kate. It’s short for communication tablet, and, yeah he could use one. (Although, just between you and me, that’s not why he’s there.)
Hard, vivid and raw – I second that! You are a fantastic writer.
Thank you, Daniela!
How different do the aliens look? Judging by the fact that you have “The Rock” playing one of them in the movie then I’m guessing externally they might be very similar to us… so the blue blood is a nice way to set them apart.
Other than having dark skin and being larger than us, yes, very human. The differences are internal and social. Thanks for asking, Goran.
Hard, vivid, raw descriptions. You kick ass, Monica. =D
Coming from the master of hard, vivid, raw descriptions, I am so flattered. Thank you, sir!
Wow. A vivid image this snippet just painted! It’s odd–a scene that involved a lot of blood being described, yet I never cringed. Really nice six.
Yay! That means I’m doin’ it right. Thanks for the feedback, Teresa!
Great description! Nice that he says he’s not there to hurt her when he’s so obviously hurt.
That’s a connection that I never made, Donna! And this is why I love feedback; you get to see your work through other people’s eyes. So cool.
This is great, Monica. For more reasons than how much I like a bruised and bloodied hero. The blue blood idea is fantastic too. Your world building is rocking, my friend. Very much looking forward to seeing more of this.
Wow! Thanks, Kylie, that’s high praise coming from another post-apocalyptic.
I liked your six sentence sunday. I just posted mines check it out. http://www.soniawrites.com/2012/07/six-sentence-sunday-brushing-teeth.html
This is a nice development. The arrival of a soldier should be a cause of terror, but this one is vulnerable. Is the blue blood a sign of rank? Colour coding for regiment? Or do they all have blue blood? Cobalt based life forms?
Thanks, Elin. All the Ohnenrai have blue blood. Their bodies bind oxygen with both iron and copper.
Interesting decision to use the color blue for his blood. Is he a “blue-blood” of his species as well? Vivid detail and imagery. Definitely looking forward to more!
Thanks, K.E. That’s a good question, and I won’t answer it. I will say that his blood is blue because it binds oxygen with copper, as well as iron.
Did the soldier just take a bath? Powerful visual. Rachel is unflinching.
Ha! More like a dive…off a cliff.
So vivid. Fantastic!
Great description…very easy to visualize!
The story is developing nicely. You have me hooked.
Thanks, Cara! Now I just havta land ya, right? ;D